14.1.07

The Journey

One day as you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice-
though the whole house began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my Life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
brances and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do-
determined to save
the only life you could save.
-MARY OLIVER

6.1.07

My New Hero


I am not big on TV--there's mostly a lot of complete rubbish on now (Celebrity Big Brother for example!). But, I do manage to catch the odd show here and there and last night was one of these exceptions. James and I caught the series premiere of "Ugly Betty" last night on Channel 4. I know its been over in the states for a few months now, but we over in the U.K. are sometimes a tad slow to get things. Anyway---Ugly Betty is my new hero. The show made me giggle and you can't help fall in love with the character played by I believe America Ferrara. Its about darn time that they put someone actually real on TV instead of people like Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan who do nothing for the self esteem of young girls out there. Usually I really wouldn't be so keen about promoting a show, but I think it has a good message that is really needed at the moment in our society. Too many things now are based on the superficial. Anyway--I know that I only saw the first episode but I know a decent thing when I see it and I have confidence that Betty will become a part of a new weekly ritual for me. Snaps for Ugly Betty!

1.1.07

Resolutions in the New Year

Gosh, where did last year go? It never ceases to amaze me how fast time flies sometimes. I think its always wonderful the first day of a New Year to look back and reflect where you've been and where you want to go in life. The biggest thing for me is I can't believe I'm 31 now and I've been in London for as long as I have. Who would have ever thought this is where I would have ended up? I remember when I first came over here and how scared I was. Tooting my own horn for a moment--wow have I changed since then. I was so young and stupid back then and now I am really starting to figure some things out. Life is the sum of our experiences and without being here in London I know for a fact I wouldn't be the person I am now. Isn't it amazing how everything is for a reason? Thinking back on last year some of the experiences I am most grateful for are:

1) Having a job for nearly a full year and James having a job for the entire year.
2) Thailand & Paris--in particular bamboo rafting in the middle of the jungle, sharing a moment w/the Hill Tribe people even though they didn't understand a word of English, sitting in a Cafe this last May on the Left Bank in Paris eating a grilled salmon & cheese sandwich w/James.
3) Going down three dress sizes.
4) Discovering Yoga
5) My theatre, concert & art trips this year.
6) James finally figuring out what was wrong w/his health.
7) Strengthening my relationship w/my brother and sister.
8) Re-Discovering Books and old movies
9) Sunday Walks w/James up through Blackheath Common down to Greenwich Park
10) "Kitty"-the neighborhood stray cat

Thinking towards the future here are some of my goals for the new year (in no significant order):

1) Finally get to where I am considered to have a "healthy" weight.
2) Fix my career and/or lack of
3) Laugh lots and lots and lots more
4) Travel--go back to some of the places that didn't quite finish like Rome, Amsterdam, Nice and tuscany.
5) Work on Relationships---make more of an effort to make friends & keep them, cherish James lots more, work on relationships w/my family.
6) Help others more--volunteer, maybe do a long haul trip to Africa, help my community, smile at strangers.
7) Learn to Forgive
8) Figure out me (patience, sense of spirtuality, etc)
9) See number three
10) Not wasting energy or time on stupid things or things that don't matter.